OK, my usual M.O. for an airport is to come in under the radar.  I dress very conservative, even trying for doubty.  Trying to look as respectable as I can.

About half the time I am singled out for a bag check.  One time I was singled out for a body X-ray.  Of all the time to be wearing ladies fruit of the loom cotton briefs.  I really should have been wearing the red lace thong I NEVER wear. (Butt floss you know, looks good but drives me bats)

This time, I have my hair spiked, with a shock of BRIGHT purple in the front.  Jeans with snaps on the side, earrings, ear cuffs.  ACK, I even scare myself.  To add to it all I have a bunch of toys picked up at the adult shop in my carry on bag.  OMG if I am not asking for a search.

Nothing.  Nada. Zilch.  Not even a funny look from the guy looking at the X-ray of my bags.

Hey!!  You are supposed to be shocked and aghast! What is going on here?

How come I get searched when I look like a farm girl or business woman? 

Hmmmrupm!
 
(Grumble mutter). Next time, it’s a pink ribbon dress with a hip length wig of blond curls and pink bowed heels. Gad, I can’t cut a break sometimes.  Looking like a hood dose not help, at least not in NY.

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